- CATEGORIES
- A Day In the Life
- A Dude's Dating Life
- A Passionate Moment
- Ask The Dude!
- Beer Time !!!
- Book of the Whatever
- Cup O' Dude
- Eddie
- F.O.M.
- Late Night
- Mid-Day Break
- Murph
- Other
- Random Thoughts
- Scales
- Soapbox
- Sports
- TDL Musicology
- The Church of Man
- The Fabulous Mr. Pito
- The Feminine Mystique
- TV / Radio / Other Media
- Under-the-Radar
- Video of the Week
- ARCHIVE
- July 2008
- June 2008
- May 2008
- April 2008
- March 2008
- September 2007
- August 2007
- July 2007
- June 2007
- May 2007
- April 2007
- September 2006
- August 2006
- July 2006
- June 2006
- May 2006
- April 2006
- March 2006
- February 2006
- January 2006
- ADMINISTRATION
- Register
- Log in
- Valid XHTML
- XFN
- WordPress
- Blogroll
- Micki Free Lives!
- Canadutch
- JBCarey.com
- What Dan Learned...
- In Place of Incandescence
- My Secret Underground Society
- Regretful Morning
- Beyond the Neon
- Subscriptions
- Technorati
- Spread the Word!
August 19th, 2006 at 8:17 pm
ok, people..since the dude is MIA and tacos is probably getting some part himself waxed, it has fallen to me to give the faithful readers at TDL something to stimulate their brain. Heres something i've been wondering about since the age of 16. Why do women date assholes?
We've all been there, fellow dudes. You meet a girl, and she ranges from cute to hot, smart, funny, sweet, doesn't seem to be the naggy type, all that good stuff. Then, right as you're about to ask her out, because you really like her and you're sure she likes you, she starts dating some other dude. And of course, said other dude turns out to be a total asshole. He's so not right for her you can't believe she even gives him the time of day, let alone gets naked and freaky with him. That thought in particular makes you want to barf. Not only is he not right for her, but he probably treats her badly as well. It sucks, and there aint shit you can do about it because its one of the cardinal rules of the universe. I dont need a survey, research, nothing. No empirical eveidence necessary. I've seen it with my two eyes. Women date assholes like it's their job.
Women, how many of you have had a girlfriend of yours who was dating a guy that you were like "what in all hell is she doing with that asshole?" I know you have, and you know you have asked that question. You've all been there when one of your gal pal's boyfriend blows her off even though you all had plans, and she was left as the fifth wheel or something and thought to yourself "what an asshole." You're planning to put his pic on dontdatehimgirl.com and says he's got the herpes. But your friend won't dump him, no matter what. And you ask yourself "why is she dating that asshole", then turn to your non-asshole boyfriend and go "dont you ever pull that on me."
Here's best part though. Girls end up dating guys they know to be assholes the moment they meet them. I have great asshole radar. Its sorta like gaydar, but it spots assholes instead. The girl dating said asshole gets hurt and wonders why men are all assholes. Well women, once again, like the strip club thing its partly your fault. Men are assholes towards women because they know that they can get away with it and their current girlfriend will stay with them or that some other woman will date them, suspecting or even knowing that the guy is an asshole. Seeing no consequence to their asshole ways, they continue in them, and the ladies line up to date them. In fact, the bigger asshole you are, the more women you seem to attract. Women, feel free to shed some light on this phenomenon.
welllll, the answer is simple really.. because women are idiots.
Cocky men are intriguing, sometimes if a man is a bit of an asshole, he is kind of sexy. The prob is we get confused between just banging him and keeping him. Which is why in the beginning we fall for him but then later end up complaining about him all the time.
It’s the same as why guys go for women who have a great body but nothing between their ears. You can’t deny it, most men would rather have a hot woman who gives them a lot of grief, than a not-so hot one who is going to treat him well.
It’s not just women who are attracted to and date the wrong people, you guys are just as guilty of it as we are.
Great post,
I am 40 years old and will never ever figure that one out. My soon to be (maybe, hope not, who knows) ex-wife and I are dealing with her ex-asshole as one of our issues.
For some unknown reason she just can’t tell the moron to crawl someplace and die despite all the pain and agony he has caused. Because of this asshole I get very little leeway when it came to my own assholish behavior with her. My gut tells me we will work it all out eventually one way or the other but I am seriously tired of paying for a previous asshole’s actions my entire life.
I saw a poster once that changed my life when it came to dealing with hot women. The poster had a picture of some insanely hot chick soaking wet in a tight t-shirt and bikini bottoms the caption said “Guys remember, somewhere in this world there is someone sick and tired of her shit”
Peace out
Now I really have to meet the individual who came up with that poster and give him a high five! That is just awesome!
briegh…i disagree with the whole men will want something hot line of thinking…i’ve known plenty of dudes who have not so cute g/f’s who could “do better”, but dont b/c the chick makes them happy…..i also think men are less inclined to put up with bitchy behavior than women are to assholish behavior….as to rob..thanks for the comment, i think u should just drga the guy out back and beat the shit out of him…i know that sounds bad, but to be honest, sometimes a wee bit of the violence is what is most useful…as to the enchilada….damn thats a tight leash youve got on tacos !
Ha, always!
I apologize everyone. I have been gone for a while but, Tacos has returned. Well, I understand about the asshole thing. Some women are stupid and then, there are the guys that like the ladies that play hard to get (and still never get none). It goes both ways but, I agree with Murph. While men like women that are hard to get, there are women that like assholes.
Always playing hard to get… Tacos
(As My Enchilada drags me around all erotically on a leash, the other muchachitas run up to me to say how cute I am and begin to rub my belly. Rub ladies, rub.)
murph, having intelligence that tacos was going to be engrossed with his enchilada and the other muchachitas, makes his way to the edge of the grotto where he spies tacos being led around the courtyard/pool area by the enchilada, and he sees the rest of the muchachitas trying to rub him on the belly, reaching into tacos’ shorty robe to do so…murph moves through the small rainforest which surrounds the grotto, and emerges at the courtyard where he finds no one….he hears a whistling sound from his left, spins and catches a poisoned dart in his gloved hand !…he turns to find his assailant…he spots him on the rocks overlooking the pool…tacos has hired the south american rainforest man from the budweiser commercials !….realizing he has no choice but to face murph in combat now that the element of surprise is gone, the jungle guy leaps down from the rocks, ready to fight….murph, realizing it would not be sporting for him to quickly dispatch the jungle guy with his more modern weaponry, cuts two large branches from the trees of the grotto and fashions them into staffs…..jungle guy is quite adept at this form of combat, and a wild battle ensues….they trade blows, and murph is not as quick with his staff as jungle guy is….jungle guy leaps onto and off of the rocks with lightning speed, smacking murph in the had with his staff as he does so…tacos and the muchachitas, watching from the window, yelp with joy as they see this…murph barely recovers, but he knows how he will achieve victory over his opponent….murph continues to fight, even though he is taking punishment…he backs towards the rocks…he knows that jungle guy is eager to impress tacos’ muchachitas, b/c lets face it, they’re a lot cuter than the jungle gals he’s used to seeing, in fact, he didnt know that breasts could be that perky…as they get close to the rocks, murph knows what is coming….jungle guy goes into his leap move, meaning to finish murph off, but murph uses his staff to catch him in the stomach in midair, and brings jungle guy down to the ground with all his strength…. a sickening thud reverbates throughout the grotto…..jungle guy twitches on the ground, totally concussed….murph rolls him with his boot into the pool where he sinks like a rock…tacos howls with fury and tears off his shorty robe and throws it down towards murph…the muchachitas begin to rub him down …the enchilada looks at tacos speedos and goes “damn tacos, whats goin on down there?”….tacos looks down, red-faced, and says “its shrinkage, dammit, that freakin pool is cold !”…by this time murph has disappeared, as has the poolside coolers of guinness….jungle guy climbs out of the pool, throws on the discarded shorty robe, and is receiving attention from a muchachita….
I think you should take this to the cartoon network. You all would make a whole lot of money then putting these ideas on a blog!
Damn… Tacos is impressed. I should have hired that Zulu lion hunter.
Laying naked on my lion skin rug… Tacos
(As I seal the door to the bedroom and blow my handy referee whistle. The muchachitas hear the whistle and begin the weekly pillow fighting contest. Poof goes the pillow and giggle goes the muchachitas.)
tacos obviously does not know the high regard in which murph holds the animal kingdom…murph is outraged that tacos would defile the skin of the noble lion by putting his naked ass upon it…..now murph is angry….
The bigger question might be:
why are there so few men around who are not assholes?
i dont know…but i do know that the number of asshole men out there is nothing compared to the amount of insane women….
Maybe what we have is a cycle…
Each asshole probably sleeps with at least 10 or 15 women. Each woman is driven insane by the asshole. Then, the insane women interact with men who aren’t assholes, but they don’t date them, because they are too busy being driven insane by the assholes.
After dealing with let’s say 3 - 5 insane females, the guy who’s not an asshole eventually decides … screw that, no more Mr. Nice Guy, and turns into an asshole.
nope, i think that that women are just insane…the evidence is there….dudes,i am issuing a call for you to back up your fellow dude with stories of the insane women you have encountered in your dating life !….back me up !
It’s the mother in us… woman instinct is “to save”…
We think that we can change them…but here is a thought for ya…
Most times, (most) women end up dating assholes…get burned, find out what they really want…and marry their heros.
atleast that is what I did.
Let me provide a more founded explanation other than “women are idiots” or “women are just insane”.
It’s human nature to love the unpreditable. Take a small child: You give the child candy everyday it it grows bored of you. You give the child candy once a year and it cries because it doesn’t get enough. But you give the child candy here and there, randomly, and though it may complain about not getting as much, the child will await each new present eagerly.
Bad boys and assholes are so much more unpredictable than nice guys. The periods of which they are ‘nice’ are random — and as a result, women appreciate those rare periods even moreso.
Bah Murph, I could turn that around and say the same thing, that I know LOTS of women who are with nice guys too. Not ALL women date assholes.
Maybe the problem isn’t us, maybe it’s you. Maybe these guys aren’t really all assholes but you just like to think they are because they’re getting the chicks you guys can’t? 
why would any rational person date a guy knowing hes a jerk, and that she’ll get cheated on and treated poorly..answer : shes not rational..shes a woman, and therfore insane….nice guys are predictable….theyre predictably nice….which brings me back to my point..why would any sane women want to date a guy knowing that there’s large chance that the guy is an asshole..not a rational choice…”hhmm let me date this guy…he seems like hes only after some sex, and he’ll probably get on one of my “friends”…thats a good decision….not all wonen are kooky though…this friend of mine is a big greys anatomy fan(as am i) and she goes “man, screw mcdreamy…he’d only run around on me anayways…give me an o’malley to play with”
oh and btw the woman instinct to save apparently vanishes at the entrance to the mall, especially at the shoe stores located within….where the “cutest” pair of flip flops is waiting….
Fortunately, I have NEVER had to deal with insane women… EVER!
Women are insane?! Where do you ever get that craziness from?!
(slinking away…)
stop slinking away…..i think i am ging to open up a camp for men where we teach them to stand up to women and their outrageous demands….camp notgonnawhipme…..thats the ticket..i’ll be a millionaire…..
Dude, you are an expert on crazy girls. I, Tacos however, have dated a woman that cannot function unless she can save her man. Unfortunately for her, I am of sound mind. She thought I was marrying material, got scared and ran off because of it. See, this girl admitted that her previous boyfriend was an asshole but loved him because she liked trying to help him. Where is she now. She got knocked up by some other asshole who is no longer with her. She is raising the kid on her own. Its sad and I wish her well, but she had a good a thing. Oh well. Now I am with someone who appreciates my nice predictable self.
Always predictably erotic… Tacos
(As I put away my past to concetrate on the more pleasurable present. Muchachitas, I am ready for my happy ending!)
always wonder where the phrase “knocked up” came from…its so great….its like “ooh…yeah ..she gt knocked up”….or “dude, yr an idiot, u knocked up that skank….” such a great phrase…..love it
You shouldn’t wish her well! SHE SUCKS!
murph reads TDL’s comments and realizes that tacos is a glutton for punishment…not only is murph hunting him, but tacos has made the fatal mistake of showing sympathy for a past flame….not good tacos, not good….
Ok, my turn……
women date ASSHOLES because they are a challenge…now to me that would be a waste of my time and energy. There are only 3 things important in a relationship.
1. SEX = because if it ain’t good, forget about it!!!
2. TRUST - because if you can’t trust your other half then get the hell out of the relationship
3. LOVE = This is the 3rd ingredient that comes in after you have found the great sex and the trust.
bottomline: women need to start thinking like a man….unfortunatley, women tend to drift off and get emotionally attached…thinking that if they give in, the asshole will change. Once an asshole always an asshole. Whether you’re a man or a woman.
Life is about 2 choices.. You either choose to be happy or be miserable. It’s nobody’s choice but yours.
I’ve learned in my past relationships…if you’re a predicatable nice partner, you get shitted on, but be the BITCH and you have every man eating out of hands.No matter how you look. I could never figure that one out….englighten me…
It’s all about the self-esteem and being confident of yourself. And in this day and age, it’s difficult I think for both genders to feel this b/c of all the pressures society puts on a human being. but well that’s a whole other topic…..
Murph, Tacos & Jason - what wuold you rather have, a pretty lady or sexy woman?
I know that answer to that one….you would date the sexy bitch but marry the pretty girl….
So why do women date assholes? I don’t know.. Why do mean like to be treated like crap to get a bitch’s attention?
i just did a search on the internet asking the aforementioned title of this paper. now that i’m reading about it, i’m starting to make what some may call a “negative attitude” toward the subject.
women: could you quit all bein skanky ass whores? could you quit going out with someone because you like being put down or something? the biggest problem i have with all of this is like what Rob is going through. the other guy gives you the shit, and gets to bang you. then, us guys get you, but now you’re damaged emotionally because the guy ended up cheating on you. and to be honest, i think women are a lot more superficial than men. that is, considering they’re the ones who are always out shopping and doing all sorts of stuff to try to look good for their asshole.
i don’t know, but i just can’t stand it anymore.
and by the way, Ellie is a moron. quit going out with the dickhead if you want a hero.
yeah justin…you got it….good dudes end up paying for the crimes of assholes….and women wonder why dudes get pissed
i can’t help but wonder what any woman would think of me if she read my statement. if i’m not careful, i’ll be on the “wrong” side. even though they are the ones that seem to have a funner life, at least early on.
i think the real lesson to be learned here is: be REALLY proactive, do not hesitate to ask her out. and on a further note…if she goes out with someone else, don’t even bother being her friend, cause it’s already over. unless of course it’s your best friend she is going out with…exceptions, exceptions.
“i think women are a lot more superficial than men. that is, considering they’re the ones who are always out shopping and doing all sorts of stuff to try to look good for their asshole”
You think that’s because *women* are superficial? Like the guy is just going to not care if the woman doesn’t put all that effort into not looking good? Maybe you should go back and read the post “Why Men Go to Strip Clubs”
wow..readers are referring other readres to past articles i wrote….i’m a quoted scholar !
I am a 37-year-old woman and according to those who know me, I am hot, smart, sweet and funny, not to mention that I hate the mall. I am who I am, no makeup, jeans, and I don’t feel like I have to wear fancy clothes and fake nails to impress a man. I am not a bitch and no man I have ever been in a relationship with will tell you I am. Well, I have NEVER met a guy who didn’t wind up hurting me and didn’t turn out to be an asshole. I never dated anyone knowing they were an asshole. I would never pick someone KNOWING they were an asshole. But every guy I ever had a relationship with pretended to be something they weren’t, turned out to be an asshole and hurt me over and over and over and over and all I ever wanted was honesty and love. Simple, easy….but none of you men know how to do that. These “nice” guys writing in here…where the hell are ya??? I suspect that you just THINK you are nice decent human beings… but are really assholes. What did that mean up there where it said “it’s kind of like the strip club thing and it being our (ladies) fault.” I am not some slut parading around naked for all you pigs!! And every one of you who spends one f-ing nickel because you are so desparate to stare at tits are just low-life ASSHOLES. So anyway, you all THINK you are so great that you have to pretend to be something you aren’t to get me… and then you hurt me and hurt me and hurt me and all I want is love and I give you every piece of myself…but you hurt me until I go INSANE and after I finally get the guts up to move on YOU WANT ME BACK…. Every freaking one of you?!?!? Seriously…my ex-husband, after 4 years, STILL calls me at least twice a month begging me to come back. I found out yet more lies and secrets my boyfried (I guess I should say ex-boyfriend) has been keeping from me. Nice. Real freaking nice. And now he is sorry. NOW he is sorry. You are all sorry when it is too late. Why is that? Where is all the caring and doing what is right RIGHT FROM THE START? You people wonder why we are insane. You make us insane. AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH. I thoroughly agree….the bitches get the men who kiss their ass… but I can’t be a bitch just to get a “good guy”….how happy will I be knowing I am being an asshole myself? It is a double-edged sword and I guess I am gonna die alone. How sad. I know how to treat my man, but my man can’t ever appreciate that until it’s too late…so I am left torn, once again, but this time I know better. I would rather die alone than get hurt one more time. I am not some stupid bitch who is a glutten for punishment. I enter each relationship with a clean slate and don’t bring past relationshps into it…and look at me!!!! You people prove you are assholes no matter what. I give up. I am seriously gonna wind up in the loony bin if I give one more man my goodheartedness and then get shit on and lied to for it. I refuse to get shit on anymore..and the only way to do that is to become a hermit. I am so mad right now I don’t even know if this makes sense. If you haven’t guessed I just gave up on this asshole yesterday and he knows I mean it..and NOW he is all sorry. It’s bullshit. It’s all bullshit. Love doensn’t even exist. It is a synonym for hate…that’s all it is…nothing good ever comes of it. Yes, I am bitter. I have been driven crazy once again. Is it so hard for two people to just treat each other with kindness, honesty and respect?? Jeesh!!
A zen master taught me that the answer to this question is always found within. When the asker of this question finally finds the river of truth, he finds that the he is the Asshole he asks about. The Zen Master knows that he is a nice guy, and in his profound knowing of this fact, he never feels the need to whine about how nice he is–and his total Fonzy Cool on the subject of Niceness will win over the ladies every time. The “Nice” guy however, only flits about blindly projecting Asshole and Stupid Bitch on all the pussy he’s never gonna get.
Be the Zen Master, young grasshoppas. Give up your unproductive ways and realize that if you have to run around proclaiming how nice you are, you are the asshole you’re complaining about–and you, by existing in your sexless state, prove that women won’t go for every asshole out there. She’s just decided that if her coices are “Whiney Asshole” or “Whiney Asshole that’s Better Looking Than You,” a girl might as well go with the eye candy.
ahem. i asked the question, yet apparently, you did not read the article beyond the title…for i did not once talk about how nice I am. try actually reading an entire article before spouting your bitter feminist venom, which has no place here at the dudes life. i know thats a stretch, b/c most things women read are nothing more than clothing and makeup advertisements, bride magazine, and mags with “700 sex secrets, again!”.. but hey if youre gonna take a shot at me, you could have the decency to read the articel before you slam it.
I’m not even sure i understood her comment… I’m trying…maybe all the moving around and relocating etc… is warping my fragile little mind.
this got juicy
nope…the rabid feminists have been silenced…so once again..all is well on TDL…..
because women have low self esteem and hate themselves and dating a asshole gives them a feeling of being needed and they also love the drama no matter what they tell you.
In our youth, most of us do not have to deal with the problems of adulthood, so most of us become concerned with popularity; those not concerned with popularity were usually classified in the bottom of the youth food chain. Unless there was something that put you out there, professional grade football player, exceptional body and looks, you had to fight to get yourself to the top; unfortunately for those who did not care so much about the youth food chain, they became the ridiculed from those who did care, in an attempt to separate themselves from those labeled in the lower categories. It becomes hard to develop social confidence when one has been labeled as such, and even if this lower labeled person sparks an interest from a guy/girl higher on the youth food chain, he/she will still avoid her/him, at least in public, to separate themselves; on the other hand, this behavior becomes excepted as flirting into adulthood, and is why that football player that picked on that nerd is still getting the girls after school, even though the football player is still living with his parents, and the nerd is a brain surgeon.
As a child, most of us are not aware of this social world, and it makes it confusing to why that girl is dating that guy. Understand , asshole or not asshole, these guys got the girls because they were considered a way to move up the chain…some of them really are not assholes! Understand also, although whining is unattractive, it comes from pain inflicted from youth.
My advise…stop the whining and work on making yourself more attractive; try making fun of that high school football player by explaining how he got those biceps at his present job, by curling Burger King patties before he puts them on the broiler chain.
yes women are complet morons . they think if a guy acts like an asshole is confident and strong, but that has noting to do with it. nice guys can protect you to ladies if they know they have you.
you women are stupid and you would deserve to be extinct asa a species or at leist lobotomized!