By Eddie
    July 31st, 2006 at 4:16 pm

(BEGIN SCENARIO) I am hanging out with my stepbrother and his wife at home. We are reminiscing of times gone by. All of us are laughing about that time I said that joke about the horse walking into the bar and how it made my stepdad blow soda out of his nose or that time at Christmas where I spilled wax all over dinner because of my sudden need to show everyone how I can pass my hand over a candle flame without getting burned. (Editor's note: Dude.  You did that?  Seriously? What the hell is wrong with you?  Sorry, back to the article.) Suddenly, all of us find ourselves in that lull in the conversation. Running out of things to talk about, because lets face it, that "horse walks into a bar" story can get old, we begin to rummage through an old box under my stepbrother's bed.
Continue reading When people get bored…stupidy becomes an option….

    By Eddie
    June 30th, 2006 at 12:53 am

My friends…I apologize for not coming around more often. I mean, what kind of person am I when I never call or write. I understand that you feel neglected. Well, I am here to share myself with you in all of my splendor. Here are few things I have noticed over the past few days/weeks/whatever that make me say “WOW, I really need to come around more often.”

1. I have noticed that things still haven’t improved in the Middle East. OH WAIT! I just found out the army had a plan to recall troops all along! Amazing. Word is it will begin just in time for this year’s election. OH THE CONVENIENCE!
2. Miami Heat are World Champs. Damn it was WHITE HOT on the day of the parade. Heat player honored during a ceremony with Miami officials, WADE JONES! Thank you Ms. Clueless Commissioner. Another Miami official publicly displaying how clueless they are regarding anything involving their city. Don’t worry; the championship wasn’t a big deal anyway (add sarcastic tone here).
3. The citizens of Dallas, a whining team owner and a blogger keeps stating the Heat’s victory was an NBA conspiracy. Notice who is still complaining.
4. Another parade comment…200,000 people marinating in their own sweat smells really bad. Another reason I will never willingly go to another Calle Ocho.
5. I hate web-assisted classes. REALLY!
6. Am I the only one that fears people that call into sport talk radio shows? They get my vote for “Most Likely To Go F-N Crazy.”
7. You ever clip your toe nails and then smell them? Well I haven’t but I heard it stinks.
8. Roberto Luongo, Roberto Luongo, Roberto Luongo
9. Go Marlins! I heard that they might be buyers at the trade deadline! Who are we kidding? They can’t buy fans! (please note, I am a huge fan and go to games but I am also a realist)
10. There is a restaurant in Boca that is selling a burger for $124.50! Can I super-size that for $.99??? Apparently the beef is combination of 3 meats. I don't know what they are but I have list of what it should be, however, I am not writing that here. “Your Mother” might be reading this.

Continue reading My 10 Cents…

    By Eddie
    June 4th, 2006 at 10:53 pm

Well, after my celebratory introduction to Planet Blog by The Dude, I feel compelled to come out of the woods like the mysterious Chupacabra and reveal myself…except I am far less interesting and definitely not mythical (except to those ladies I knew in college… oh who am I kidding?). First of all, nothing makes me feel more welcome than having the red carpet rolled out in the form of a cliff-note on some random site such as Planet Blog in this infinite universe known as the Internet (see pukie gray box on right side of screen). In any case, here I go. I, The Un-Named (which will change as soon as I figure out something cool to call myself. I thought Laser was stupid), is a man that wants to walk down streets with no name in the city of blinding lights with or without you. That’s right, I am a U2 fan, but I will write more about that in a later article. In addition, I am an avid Miami Heat fan (I share the same views with The Dude regarding the ‘Toine). But, since it is late and with no real topic of which to write about, I will disappear into the forest just like the Chupacabra. However, unlike the Chupacabra, I will not leave a trail of animal entrails as proof of my existence, but will leave this……

The real King will bring the crown to Miami…(sorry Lebron but you need to win first before getting that stupid nickname)
Continue reading This is only a test-icle……