By Jason
    April 29th, 2008 at 3:05 pm

This Roger Clemens saga is getting more bizarre by the day.  The latest developments show that Roger not only actually did engage Mindy McCready when she was 15, but actually waited until she was legal before he hit that 4 ways towards Thursday.  The best part is that she confirms all this.  I can't decide if I still think the whole thing is creepy.  I'm leaning towards yes.  Anyway, here's the article out of Newsday.

Continue reading Mid-Day Break: She Says It's True!!…

    By Jason
    April 24th, 2008 at 10:09 am

Found in today's Sun-Sentinel, apparently some small hospital in Australia has become over-run by the most vile of creatures. A creature so horrid, so terrible, that it forced the hospital itself to be temporarily shut down so they can bring in a priest and exercise it's demons. What's infesting this hospital? Read for yourself and find out!

Continue reading Mid-Day Break: And You Thought MRSA Was A Problem……

    By Jason
    April 22nd, 2008 at 2:13 pm

Although I'm a little late with the Mid-Day Break (not that we ever work on a time schedule here), I'm proud to say announce that the wait is over!! In what will be a cause for celebration across TDL-land, the Miami Dolphins announced today that they are selecting Jake Long with the first pick in Saturday's NFL draft. This really couldn't be better news for us, and to show our appreciation, I fully expect that all TDL staff members will be running out and getting tribal arm-band tattoos.

Now, I honestly only watched a couple Michigan games, and I'm not going to lie. If you think I ever watch 5 seconds of a lineman's footwork, you're fooling yourself. So really, I guess I'm trying to say that I know nothing about Long other than he has a GIANT tribal arm-band tattoo. But you know what? That's ok. We aren't celebrating because the 'Fins picked HIM, per se. We celebrate because FINALLY, after months and months and months, we are DONE listening to sports-hole radio callers whining, "what are the 'Fins doing with the first pick?!" It's over!! I couldn't be happier! (The only thing better would have been if the 'Fins decided they didn't like anyone and just skipped the first round sending all of Dolphin-nation into a suicidal frenzy. I mean, as a Fin-fan, I'd have been pissed, but I'd take one for the team to see those lunatic fans on the brink. Sigh….

    By Jason
    April 21st, 2008 at 9:33 am

A buddy fowarded this link to me this link to a New York Times article.  Apparently PETA has adopted the "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em" slogan as parts of the organization has finally come to grips with the fact that people like their meat.  What's there new push?  Fake-meat!  That's right, steak lovers!  One day, thanks to PETA and other organizations, you can have that cut of beef that only looks like it came off a cow's ass!  That's exciting news, my friends!!

PETA's Latest Tactic: $1 Million for Fake Meat
Continue reading Mid-Day Break: Who Says PETA Isn't Foward-Thinking?…

    By Jason
    April 18th, 2008 at 10:06 am

Today's little nugget has been making it's way around various news feeds. This entry is brought to you from Yahoo! News.  Baseball fans will appreciate the injury concern that the losing team's coach showed in his post-game comment. 

TOKYO (Reuters) - A Japanese high school pleaded for a regional game to be abandoned after surrendering 66 runs in less than two innings, local media reported on Thursday.  The coach of Kawamoto technical high school threw in the towel to spare his pitcher's arm with his team losing 66-0 with just one batter out in the bottom of the second.  The hapless hurler had already sent down over 250 pitches, allowing 26 runs in the first inning and 40 in the second before Kawamoto asked for mercy.  "At that pace the pitcher would have thrown around 500 pitches in four innings," Kawamoto's coach was quoted as saying. "There was a danger he could get injured."  Opponents Shunshukan were officially credited with a 9-0 victory, giving the scoreline a tinge of respectability for the luckless Kawamoto school.

    By Jason
    April 16th, 2008 at 12:50 pm

As our loyal reader is aware, I often take great pride in making sure that the material that I discuss is amongst the most politically correct, non-offensive material you will find on the net.  Perhaps that is why I am taking such a pain-staking approach to bringing up this topic with as much sensitivity and respect as possible.  I guess the best way to go about it is to simply dive right in… 

Dear Business Owners,
Continue reading Mid-Day Break: I'll have the green stuff……

    By Jason
    April 8th, 2008 at 1:55 pm

At first I couldn't believe it, but ineed, it's true!!  According to Ira Winderman of the Sun-Sentinel, the Miami Heat have resigned none other than… Wait for it…  NBADL Player of the Year Kasib Powell!!!!  This is just unbelievable news coming from Heat camp!!  I'm so happy I can just kick myself in the nads.

Continue reading Mid-Day Break: He's back!!…

    By Jason
    April 1st, 2008 at 1:04 pm

Normally I write a quick little quip about whatever it is I'm introducing as the Mid-Day Break.  This time, I gotta tell you… I've got nothing.  I mean, I just don't even know what to do with this from FoxSports.com: Continue reading Mid-Day Break: And Here, I Thought By Race They Meant Formula 1……

    By Jason
    March 25th, 2008 at 9:21 am

Taylor Scores Big With Mambo

No, that’s not my headline, that’s the headline on the front page of Sunsentinel.com. Apparently there are enough people so fascinated by ol’ Twinkle Toes Taylor (he said to call him that), that this is suddenly front page news. Now before I continue, out of respect of full disclosure, I absolutely admit that I’m not necessarily going to be winning any Man’s Man awards anytime soon. In fact, I think I feel pretty comfortable saying that probably none of us are. With that said, I have a line, and if you are you a dude watching Dancing With the Stars for Jason Taylor’s dancing, you sir, should have your man-card permanently revoked..
Continue reading Mid-Day Break: What's that Christine?!? You voted against who?!?…

    By Jason
    March 24th, 2008 at 12:12 pm

I couldn't possibly go the entire off-season without adding at least a short note about our mighty Hurricanes of Miami!  (As you know, we here at TDL madly support the U!)  I'm going to pretend that I didn't watch the first 35 minutes of yesterday's Texas game and completely ignore the fact that it only took 75 minutes for Raymond Hicks to realize Miami was still playing in games when I say that they really fought valiently to the end.  It was a great run guys!  Plus, you have to have every reason to think that they'll make it even further next year, right? McClinton is coming back.  Eddie Rios will have another year under his belt, as will Jimmy Graham and company.  Plus, now that they've all watched two whole tourney games in person (except for Jack who actually played pretty well for what amounts to 3/4 of a game) (Oh wait. I promised I was going to ignore the fact for most of the tourney they all looked like they were watching the other team run shooting drills.), they actually will be better able to deal with the adversity they'll get in next year's tourney run!  Congrats Miami!!  Way to help us forget just how much we hate every little part of Perry Clark's soul! (I do mean EVERY little part of it.  Darius Rice sends his love Perry.  He told me so while he was camped out in the corner waiting for the ball.  Word is he's become a permanent fixture of the arena since his feet have literally grown into the court.  Way to go Perry.)  (Yeah, I'm still bitter.)  HAVE FAITH IN HAITH!!!