By Eddie
    April 30th, 2008 at 6:45 pm

There you are. You are sitting and sifting through the endless search results of some lame internet job search engine. You go fishing for that "Next Step" in your career. While perusing the endless list of "quick money" scam jobs that apparently inundate these search engines, you finally find that one perfect job ad that seems to fit what you are looking. You then proceed to click through another endless maze of web pages requiring you to register yourself on the company's online career database. Lastly, you finally get to click the "Apply Now" button and what do you get? A motherBLEEPING personality survey! After spending 20 freaking minutes on registering alone, now I have to spend another 20 minutes answering questions like "what is your favorite color" and "have you ever lied before." Who the hell is answering that question with a "No, I have never lied before." I lied when I was 10 and blamed the dog for my mom's broken lamp! Now I am going to be judged by that? I mean honestly, is there some correlation of answers to ridiculous questions like these that can make me out to be a serial killer? Really, is there? I mean what happened to just having a simple phone interview to gauge someone. I mean don't people lie on these surveys anyways? Continue reading The Pre-Date Survey…

    By The Fabulous Mr. Pito
    April 30th, 2008 at 11:00 am

Another Wednesday arrives and with it, a new vision. The Fabulous Mr. Pito emerges from his coop where just the night before, he saw a strange alignment of stars in the sky. After interpreting the meaning of this astronomical phenomena, The Fabulous has this to offer:

Continue reading The Fabulous Mr. Pito…

    By Murph
    April 30th, 2008 at 2:10 am

hello, tdl readers. you know, in america today we face a serious crisis. we are fast becoming the fattest nation on earth. our growing girth will have long term ramifications on our nation as a whole. it will affect our health care system which will in turn affect our economy, real estate prices will soar b/c we'll need more room to accomodate our fat asses and so on and so forth. seriously, its a problem. we here at tdl are no exception. i myself am doing my part and carrying some extra cargo around, much to my chagrin.

no what can we do to stop this you ask ? well you can put down the junk food and start working out. but murph, you ask, which workout should i do ? this is a good question, and there's no set answer. people join gyms they dont go to, buy equipment they don't use, and are afraid thier neighbors will laugh at them if they are spied jogging around lookin like a manatee on ice skates. there are the do-at-home workout dvds. which one to choose ? there are so many in the exercise dept. at target, on tv, at sports auth. all over. some work, some are totally ridiculous, and some are fraudulent. people find it difficult to stick with them, as they get repetitive and people need to keep it fresh.  but my fellow americans, i, your friendly neighborhood murph has come to your aid. i have found the workout video that will never get old, will always be fun, and have SERIOUS benefits for you. this will add to your quality of life like no other. i am talking about the jenna jameson home work out system.
Continue reading Solving the Crisis…

    By Jason
    April 29th, 2008 at 3:05 pm

This Roger Clemens saga is getting more bizarre by the day.  The latest developments show that Roger not only actually did engage Mindy McCready when she was 15, but actually waited until she was legal before he hit that 4 ways towards Thursday.  The best part is that she confirms all this.  I can't decide if I still think the whole thing is creepy.  I'm leaning towards yes.  Anyway, here's the article out of Newsday.

Continue reading Mid-Day Break: She Says It's True!!…

    By Jason
    April 29th, 2008 at 11:00 am

As TDL grows, we will be incorporating various additional features aimed at not only entertaining you, but also challenging your beliefs and practices as dudes. One of those features begins today; the official unveiling of The Fraternal Order of Men, or F.O.M., if you will. What is this, you ask? Have a read, and think carefully. Should you agree to become a member (if you are indeed a man, you are don't have a choice anyway) you are forever bound by the code. Continue reading The Fraternal Order Of Men: Rules To Live By…

    By Jason
    April 29th, 2008 at 12:20 am

Good morning TDL! As a new service to you, we here at TDL will scour the internet to find interesting AND work-safe links to enjoy while you have your morning cup of coffee.  As always, if you come across something that we haven't hit up (which is basically most things right now), and you think dudes will be interested in it, send it along and we'll include it in the next days 'Cup O' Dude'. Without further ado, enjoy! Continue reading Tuesday Morning Cup O' Dude!…

    By Jason
    April 28th, 2008 at 12:50 am

Top of the morning to you fine readers of TDL. As a new service to you, we here at TDL will scour the internet to find interesting AND work-safe links to enjoy while you have your morning cup of Dunkin Donuts hot tea with cream. (Hey!! I can't drink coffee, ok?! It's the best I can do!) As always, if you come across something that we haven't hit up (which is basically most things right now), and you think dudes will be interested in it, send it along and we'll include it in the next days 'Cup Of Dude'. Without further ado, enjoy! Continue reading Monday Morning Cup O' Dude…

    By Murph
    April 27th, 2008 at 2:16 am

alright, my congregation. i have returned to you here at the Church Of Man this week with a sermon of great importance to dudes everywhere.  as well all know, we here at tdl love us some womens. what we dont love however are some of the more annoying traits of female behavior. they are many and varied, but the one that merits special attention this morning is that all-too-common moment when you lady spots a chick who is hotness incarnate and goes "do you think shes pretty?" or "what about her, is she hot?" or "is she hotter than me?" and my favorite, "look at that slut" and you're looking for some floozy only to black out and drool for 10 seconds after spotting the hotness that you g/f is currently denigrating. seriously, this chick is so hot that carrot top could come whack you in the balls and you wouldn't notice it, transfixed as you are by her beauty, and here is your lady, asking you what you think of her. like its not obvious.

now i find this behavior aggravating to the extreme for many reasons. first of all ladies, you wouldn't be asking if you didn't think the hottie was attractive in the first place. (now i'm not talkin about your friend who cant get a date, who you go"shes cute right?" and your dude says yes, just so you can say "my b/f thinks yr cute, hang in there, you'll find someone") i'm talkin about when your cruising the mall, and you spot a five-alarm inferno of sexy.  you know shes hot when you ask, and you just want your guy to answer in the negative to show that he's sufficiently whipped into saying that she is indeed repulsive just to please you, despite the fact that he's pitching a tent in his shorts.
Continue reading The Church Of Man: Yes, She's Hotter Than You….

    By Eddie
    April 26th, 2008 at 7:00 pm

Apparently we here at TDL live under a rock. I just saw this YouTube video called Battle at Kruger which had already been viewed by almost 30 million people. For all the goofing around we do, we obviously missed this internet sensation. The video was taken by some tourists (I assume) out on an African safari when they stumble upon a pride of lions by a watering hole. The lions are getting ready to pounce on a herd of buffalo and end up capturing one of the herds' babies. This is where nature mayhem begins. For those readers that are squeamish and don't want to watch the video because you don't want to see baby buffaloes eaten, don't worry. You will be pleasantly surprised at the end. You end up rooting for the buffaloes as if they are your favorite football team. The video will be used in a documentary on one of the Discovery Channel stations coming up soon.
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Continue reading Video of the Week(end): Battle at Kruger…

    By Eddie
    April 26th, 2008 at 4:30 pm

Alright fellow readers,

That time of the week has come where we all have to make that critical decision. What the BLEEP am I going to do this weekend? Well we here are at TDL try to provide suggestions for the uninspired. Even though you can't ever go wrong with a good watering hole to go hunting for one night of love, sometimes we look for something with a little more depth, meaning if you will. If you are one of those looking for something to do that has substance, then I say check out the movie Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay.
Continue reading Its the weekend! WTF am I to do?!?…